Navigating Conflict for Holistic Mums Embracing Ayurveda and Matrescence

Conflict is an unavoidable part of life. Internal battles stemming from self-doubt or external disputes with family and friends can significantly impact your wellbeing.

As holistic mums, we often embrace wellness practices, mindful living, and spiritual growth - but conflict is something that still catches many of us off guard. Whether it’s disagreements with partners, friends, family, or even the tiny humans we love so fiercely, conflict can stir deep emotions, leaving us exhausted and unsure.

In this blog post, we will explore effective conflict management strategies dedicated to holistic mums, enabling you to create a harmonious atmosphere for yourself and your loved ones.

Understanding Conflict in the Context of Matrescence

Ayurveda teaches us that every individual has a unique constitution, or Prakriti, and that imbalance can manifest as tension, irritability, or overreaction. During matrescence, these imbalances are often amplified because our bodies, hormones, and emotional landscapes are shifting dramatically. Recognising this, we can approach conflict not as a battle to win but as an opportunity for growth and self-awareness.

Conflicts often mirror our inner turbulence. By tuning into our energy types doshas (Vata, Pitta, Kapha), we can identify why we react in certain ways:

• Vata mums may feel anxious or scattered during disagreements.

• Pitta mums might become fiery, intense, or overly critical.

• Kapha mums may withdraw or suppress feelings to avoid tension.

Knowing this allows us to respond rather than react. Conflict becomes a chance to practice mindful presence.

We often find ourselves in conflict with ourselves and our loved ones

All mums experience conflicting emotions about their parenting capabilities. These internal battles can lead to feelings of guilt, anxiety, or even loneliness. Externally, differences in parenting styles or lifestyle choices often create tensions with family members or friends. Acknowledging and addressing these conflicts with compassion can pave the way for effective resolution.

Strategies for Internal Conflict Resolution

Self-Reflection

Internal conflict often arises when our needs, emotions, or values feel misaligned.

Ayurveda reminds us that imbalances in the doshas can influence how these conflicts appear:

• Vata imbalance can create anxiety, overthinking, or feeling scattered.

• Pitta imbalance can bring irritability, frustration, or a tendency to dominate.

• Kapha imbalance can result in withdrawal, apathy, or holding grudges.

Journaling can help identify the root cause:

• “Am I reacting from fear, frustration, or fatigue?”

• “What would restore balance in my body and mind?”

Reflecting regularly allows you to notice patterns, release built-up tension, and approach yourself with compassion—a key part of matrescence.

Mindfulness Practices

Mindfulness helps anchor you in the present, preventing dosha-driven reactions from escalating:

• Vata: Ground yourself with deep breathing, slow walking, or holding warm objects. A short meditation can calm the nervous system and reduce scattered thinking.

• Pitta: Balance fiery tendencies with cooling techniques—sip herbal teas, practice slow, intentional breathing, or visualise calming water.

• Kapha: Lift sluggish energy with invigorating movement, like gentle stretching, a brisk walk, or dynamic yoga sequences.

Even a few minutes of awareness each day strengthens emotional regulation, so conflicts are approached from clarity rather than reactivity.

Navigating External Conflicts with Grace

Open Communication

External conflicts arise when needs or perspectives collide. Ayurveda teaches that understanding both your dosha and others’ tendencies can guide compassionate communication.

For instance:

• Vata partners or friends may respond emotionally or unpredictably—approach them with grounding words and calm gestures.

• Pitta individuals may argue passionately—respond with patience and cooling language.

• Kapha personalities may avoid confrontation—invite dialogue gently and without pressure.

Reflective phrases help:

• “I hear your perspective, and I’d like to share mine too.”

• “It sounds like you felt frustrated—can you tell me more?”

Set Boundaries

Healthy boundaries protect your energy and restore balance:

• “I need to take a break before continuing this discussion.”

• “Let’s revisit this topic when emotions are calmer.”

• “I appreciate your concern, but this is my choice for my family.”

Boundaries are not walls—they are a way of honouring your dosha needs and modeling emotional intelligence for your children.

The Importance of Self-Care in Conflict Management

Conflict is far easier to navigate when your body and mind are nourished. Ayurveda emphasises self-care aligned with your dosha:

Nourishing Your Body

• Vata: Grounding, warm, and moist foods—stews, soups, cooked grains, nuts. Avoid cold or dry foods that exacerbate restlessness.

• Pitta: Cooling foods—cucumbers, coconut, leafy greens, and sweet fruits. Limit overly spicy or sour foods that intensify irritability.

• Kapha: Light, stimulating foods—vegetables, legumes, warming spices like ginger. Avoid heavy, oily, or overly sweet foods that deepen sluggishness.

When your body is balanced, your emotional resilience increases, giving you more patience in conflict.

Engaging in Creative Outlets

Ayurveda also teaches that emotional energy must flow to avoid blockages:

• Painting, writing, or journaling can help express and release emotion.

• Gardening, cooking, or dancing offers a physical outlet for pent-up tension.

• Even short meditation or breathwork sessions allow energy to move, especially for Vata or Kapha imbalances.

Join a Supportive Community

Surround yourself with people who understand the challenges of matrescence and can offer encouragement. Consider joining parenting groups, both locally and online, that focus on holistic living and Ayurveda. Connecting with others can ease feelings of isolation and provide valuable insights and friendships.

If you’re craving deeper support, I offer small group circles where we connect with others and reflect on life's conflicts together.

Join the Intuitive Mother's Circle

A group of people sits in a circle, raising their joined hands in unity and support.

A Journey of Growth and Learning

Conflict doesn’t have to be a source of guilt or shame. It’s a mirror reflecting where we need to grow, heal, and tune into our holistic selves. By blending Ayurveda’s wisdom with the transformative journey of matrescence, we can approach disagreements with compassion—for ourselves and for others.

Motherhood transforms everything, including the way we navigate conflict. Each tension-filled moment is an invitation to slow down, breathe deeply, and practice the soulful art of presence. And in doing so, we model resilience, empathy, and conscious living for the little hearts that watch us most closely.

If this cycle of tension, overwhelm, or repeated conflict feels familiar—I want you to know, there’s nothing wrong with you.

You’re not weak. You’re not failing. You’re simply a whole system, asking to be seen, supported, and nourished.

🌿 If you’re not sure where to begin, you can start with the Mama Energy Quiz — a free, gentle way to understand your energy needs and which part of your system needs the most care right now.

Let's tend to your energy, emotions, body, and rhythm together. I offer small group circles and 1:1 holistic motherhood guidance.

This is your permission to begin with just one breath, one shift, one small act of care.

You don’t need to do it alone. 💛